It's finally here...

Well a month of anticipation, parties and being good so that Santa will come see me and it is finally Christmas Eve. I will be in bed soon as Norad says the big guy in red will be hitting the United States in an hour or so.
Truly an amazing Christmas on every level. Forget that I haven't opened the "big presents" yet, this Christmas will go in my personal record book for being wonderful whether I have gifts or not. I have had my friends and family near and dear almost everyday. There has been a lot of laughter, a few tears, and more hugs than I can even begin to count. It has been a long road to this Christmas, to these friends and a church family that I was convinced could not exist for me again. When I moved back to Spartanburg two years ago, I never thought I would find a home like the one I had left in Asheville. I couldn't believe God would let you strike gold twice. I am the most blessed girl in the world.
Merry Christmas dear friends and family near and far, old and new and to the ones who lie ahead on the road for me to meet. May the coming year keep the spirit of love that has filled every nook and cranny of the last few weeks.

Sadness...

So amid all the joy and frivolity of this season, here comes tragedy. We know that death comes to us all eventually; no man is immortal. But at Christmas death seems somehow more cruel, more real and in some ways more final. The death of a friends mother reduced me to a puddle last night. I have never met this woman and yet her death brought a flood of emotion from me. Memories of my own mother's death two years ago came rushing up to the surface and all my strength and diginified reserve were lost.
This year Christmas has been so vivid, in such full technicolor. The joy of it has been overwhelming, and on the flip side this sadness is just as vivid and rich. My prayers are with my friends and their loss but selfishly it makes me turn inward and mourn my own losses. It also makes me want to build up the walls of defense another layer. I want to protect myslef from the hurt and so up goes the protective barriers. The problem with these barriers is that while they protect from the pain the lock out the joy and reduce the vivid colors to grays. It's a constant stuggle for me to keep the walls down and enlist a little bravery against the sadness.
In the mean time, say a prayer for the Edge family and love the ones you have a little more this Christmas.

A few words on banking etiquette

As a bank teller I find it necessary to say afew word to the banking illiterate.

First, if you want to make a deposit, you should bring a deposit slip. They are quite handy and usually located in the back of your checkbook. Now when you are filling it out the top line says "CASH." This is where you should write in any cash that you are depositing. Any checks you are depositing should not be listed there, but instead on the following lines that have a place for you to put a check number.
Secondly, if you would like some cash back from your deposit you need to write that amount in the "Less Cash recieved" line just above the total. If you want to do this you also must sign the space provided labled "Sign here for cash recieved." This is to protect the teller from giving money from your deposit to someone other than you. In the event that you forget to sign this part, your teller will ask you to do it. Now this is not a cue for you to cuss him or her out. They are actually trying to protect you not harass you so please bear that in mind.
Moving right along...cashing checks. If you go to the bank to cash a check do not be shocked when you are asked for and ID. This is simply a way of protecting our customers. It's actually pretty standard opperating procedure, and unless having your identity stolen really trips your trigger you should smile and cooperate.
Lastly. When you open an account you are given a little booklet called a register. Now you are supposed to right down the checks you right to people and the checks you deposit into your account. In the instance that the checks you right out amount to more than the checks you put in you will be in the negative. This is not my fault. I realize it is inconvenient and you will be charged fees, but again, I didn't do it. You will have to take care of it yourself, and cussing me out will not make me have sympathy for your situation.

These are just a few things to keep in mind next time you visit your bank. :)

A little run-in

Sunday morning I was running ridiculously late and didn't really take the time to defrost my car. I could see out of the windshield and the rest of the windows remained covered in a veil of ice. In my hurry I pulled out of my road ignoring the fact that I couldn't see any on coming traffic. It's a normally very quiet road with very little traffic and I just took the gamble and of course lost. It wasn't a hard hit and it took a moment to register what had happened. Once it did I turned into a puddle of tears and got out of the car to see what had happened and if the other driver was ok. Out of a huge SUV comes a large african american man dressed up in his best black suit and red tie and all I could think was "Please don't kill me." It was one of those moments when you know you screwed up and will gladly admit it and just don't want to be cussed out int he mean time even if you deserve it.
This man promptly folded me into his arms and told me he was fine and was more worried about whether I was ok or not. My stupidity run amuk and he was worried about a complete stranger. He checked my car and both of our vehicles were perfectly fine and we were fine and then he commented on our matching Christmas church attire to make me laugh. At this point I was amazed at the kindness I had literrally ran into. Then I was more amazed as the man took my hands and suggested we say a prayer of thanks together and then go on our own ways to God's house. I stood shivering in the cold, crying and praying with a total stranger who was showing me an amazing amount of grace.
I may never meet this guy again and that is really ok with me. I had a stranger show me a little Christmas grace and for that I am eternally grateful.

Making a Memorable Christmas

Last night we had a really informal night at church where we sang a lot of carols both sacred and secular and told stories and had a great time being an extended family to one another. During the course of the evening different ones told tales of their favorite Christmas memories. Our pastor, Scott, posed the question of what God's favorite Christmas memory would be. He of course gave promise of a sermon to come with many Biblical references. I, being not so theologically inclined or intellectually minded have my own thoughts on the subject. I am of the opinion that God generally is good with anytime that we his children come together in his name. I also think that he loves seeing his children love one another even when loving one another is the most difficult thing to do. With these things in mind I suppose that God's favorite Christmas memories are much like ours. The times when we are together with friends or family and they fill your heart with such joy you think you will burst from trying to hold it all. The times when the Christmas spirit feels a million miles away and someone brings you a miracle that is particularly personal and specific to you and where you are. Even more amazing when that person is clueless that they are the deliverer of the miracle that you and you alone needed. I figure, God doesn't get much pleasure out of midnight door-busters at the mall in order to fight over a vacuum cleaner that you must have to wrap up for someone who could frankly care less about a vacuum cleaner and won't appreciate it anyway. He probably doesn't gain a great deal of joy out of his children going into ridiculous amounts of debt to give others unneeded gifts all in the name of Christ's birth. God's ultimate Christmas gift to us wasn't really about frivolous wants like my wish list is full of. His gift was about a need. A need to save all of mankind and about loving people so much that you would give what is most costly to fulfill that need, even at the cost of one's own son. I'm not God and my capacity to love and give is so minuscule in comparison, but I want to strive this year to make it a Christmas that God would want to remember by keeping His example fresh in my mind.

Reindeer Games

As I have always lived in a church environment I am not certain how the secular world views church choirs. I am not certain that it has any real view whatsoever on them. I am certain, however, that whatever view they may have has nothing to do with the absolute insane frivolity that my church choir is.
We had our Christmas party last night and I, with my strong handle on church culture am still left speechless and giddy with the antics of the night. Who knew that a pair of pantyhose and some balloons could make reindeer antlers and that and old man with the word "Vixen" (ala Santa's reindeer) on his back could bring such laughter to my heart and joyful tears to my eyes. In fact, we had fun at church with church people.
So often I get the impression that people believe that if you are of the mind to glorify God by attending a church you must be one of two things. Either a stodgy stick in the mud who believes that fun is only for the heathen or you are a hypocrite who raises hell 6 days a week and then prays for forgiveness on Sunday. Both extremes exist and I am well familiar with both stereotypes but most of us are just normal joes and janes who love God and enjoy life. It has been known to happen at the same time. God was not lacking a sense of humor, and I don't believe he wanted his children to be either. So maybe putting a pair of stockings on a friends head and and stuffing them with balloons was not exactly what the Lord Jesus had in mind for his birthday party but maybe it was. Maybe just maybe God himself had as much fun last night with his children in his house as I did. I certainly hope so.

Christmas Parades and Sushi

Who knew that these two things went so beautifully together. My church served free hot chocolate at the Spartanburg Christmas parade this week and made tons of great memories. The parade was entertainment beyond entertainment. Who needs Macy's when you can have the Spartanburg Hillbilly Shriners backfiring down Main and Church Street. Not to mention the Remax float flicking the Bic on a hot air balloon sans balloon. All this and enough hot chocolate to float to China and good friends that warm your heart in a way that defies soggy cold weather.
And then there was the sushi...
I will eat anything. My friends call me Mikey in that respect, but sushi was my last holdout. It made me queese up ever so slightly and I just never made the effort to overcome. Well no more. 18 church friends and of course Robin, the conossuier of all things sushi, were enough to make me overcome my fears and gag reflexes and have a wonderful unforgetful virgin voyage into the world of rolled up raw fix. All in all a good experience with the exception of barbecued eel. This little tidbit I can certainly pass on.
I made a new friend as well. An 82 year old man who I knew of but had never made friends with properly was the best person to share this first sushi venture with. After being brought a plate of tuna sashimi he prompty filled his mouth with a huge bite of ginger, and then after sitting silently for awhile commented "That wasn't bad, but I can't feel my false teeth."
Unforgettable!

Christmas is Coming

So here we are almost to the close of 2008 and Christmas is coming on like gangbusters everywhere you go. Downtown lights are lit, parties abound from every direction and even the most devout hermit needs a Blackberry to keep up with his holiday calendar of events.
I myself am juggling church and work parties and making time for movie nights with friends who are so close we don't need an invitation to celebrate together. Most of my Christmas presents are made because somewhere in my youth or childhood I decided homemade presents were the best. You would have to consult all the receivers of my gifts to get a real idea of whether or not I should hang that idea up or not, but I get a real kick out of it.
The church choir contata is tomorrow and of course I am thrilled even though the idea of choir robes makes my curly hair lay straight. This is by far my favorite time of year. No two Christmases are ever alike except that they all have their own special spark, their own little miracle waiting to be unwrapped. Sometimes they are big and flashy like Rudolph's nose and sometimes they are understated and found only when you take a moment to watch the squirrels pack in their food for the winter and smell the air for the hints of pumpkin, apple and pecan pie.
So here I wait anxiously to see what will be the gift of this year, and try desperately to remember that although all of the granduer lifts my spirits, the Lord's birthday is the reason for all of this and that lifts my soul.