Friendships

I have been sick this week so my apologies for the lack of post.  I did have a little surge of fever induced inspiration so I did a little playing on the Picnik and here are the fruits of the labor.
Just a few photos of the people I don't see enough, but can't live without.

And to the girls I see whenever I need to but never want to be found taking them for granted...

Goodbye "09 and all your "Huge Times"

Well that was the mantra, "Huge Time in '09."  Did I live up to it?  Who knows, but I do know I have loved much and been loved more than I could have been asked for.  I have come together and fell apart in so many areas of my life, but sitting here at my desk drinking my super strong cup of hot organic peppermint tea I think I actually lived under the radar this year.  I kept waiting for something big and I missed alot of little, which is not very me. 
But the truth is...
I bought and paid for my first car that I actually bought myself.
I said goodbye to Blanche, the greatest gift I ever recieved.
I bought what might be the last of my host of bridesmaids' dresses.
I saw two of my best friends get married to wonderful men.
I saw two Carolina Gamecock football games with the greatest girl in the world.
I met an awesome girl named Sarah and then watched her move away to an amazing job in DC.
I made a bazillion scarves for the people I love.
I watched the person who is suppose to love me the most desert me.
I loved someone so much it hurt.
I watched my dear friend lose her dearest friend and sister.
I got back a sister I had lost years ago and with her the most amazing kids in the world.
I spent a year without laying eyes on one Wild Woman.
I used up 90% of my alloted cell phone minutes talking to Wild Women.
I dressed up as Marilyn Monroe.
I realized I have the best cousins in the world (even the dorks who pull for Clemson.)
I bought a Clemson tie (yes, this was big)
I bought two Gamecock boas (best money ever spent)
I did the Macarena with the best church family in the world.
I went to see the Wild Things with my little sister.
I saw the best guy I know move away to Baltimore and leave me with a bunch of Grandmas.
I sang second soprano (badly)
I cried in the rain.
I danced in the rain.

All in all not a blow out year but certainly not a bust.  Thanks for the memories 2009.
Cheers!  and let's live it up in 2010!!!!

Summer 2009

There are a few versions of this summer...the one we planned for and the one that met us at the door. I can't write it all out together. There is so much to say to the people I love and I can't quite mesh all the conflicting thoughts together. I thought time would help me gain perspective, but alas I feel if I wait to long I will loose the vivid colors of each moment I want to pay homage to. So here is a blog in pieces for the sisters I love.

For Sarah...
There has never been a cooler bride nor will there ever be again. When others might have gone bridezilla nuts, you never took yourself to seriously and never expected your friends to be anything but themselves. Your sense of humor was never lost even when our whole caravan got lost on the way to the hotel going in different directions. It was just another fabulous adventure to share. You and Adam brought tears to my eyes as you said your vows and standing next to your new sister in law gave me the comfort of knowing how much you are loved in this new family the two of you have brought together. For everything from learning to walk down spiral stairs in heels and a ball gown to meeting Ken in the middle of the rehearsal by saying "Hi, I'm Jess. Nice Charlie Brown shirt." I thank you. It was wonderful and unforgettable and I am above and beyond grateful for being able to take part and bear witness. I love you.
Oh, and you can take pride in knowing that of all the bouquet's I've "caught," yours was the one that came to me without deliberate encouragement. :)

For Jackie...
My dearest Jacks, I learned more about our friendship and how important you are to me this summer than in all the time we lived together. I just wanted to wrap my arms around you and never let go, but I know that isn't your style and our geographical challenges make that a bit complicated. In that weekend in the midst of wedding frivolity there were moments when a conversation would lull, or there would be a pause that was just slightly to long and in that moment I knew that's were you belonged. Missing you and loving you and knowing you weren't with us because you were facing the hardest saddest days of your life made me ache and I can't quite find all the words I need to say to you. All I know is that I never knew how much I leaned on you and depended on you until you weren't there and I hope you know that you can lean on me every now and then too. I love you bebe.

For Dano...
On the surface I suppose we may look like we have the least in common of the four of us. I guess I've always seen it that way, but in this summer of joy and grief I was glad to have you to take the journey with. It's funny, but looking back we have spent the least amount of time together, but those simple plain things we share in common were the greatest comfort to me this summer. We know grief and we know it from similar places, neither of us are very keen on driving in unknown places at night and make up isn't on the top of any skill list that would be attributed to us. This and so much more made me so glad to have you by my side. You made me laugh harder, and stay braver and when I was silent you and you alone knew why. Thanks for being my sidekick in an impossible situation of conflicts. You held me together and made me stand on my own and never let me forget to laugh. I love you, pal.

Here Comes the Sun...do do do doo

YaYa wedding number two: Tim and Dano Zynda-Clark
Tears seeped out of my eyes watching my pal Dano say I do to Tim yesterday. This is my Dano, the girl who taught me to love Jane Austen, went tubing with me in Lake Hartwell, and consistently opened my eyes to new adventures between the covers of good books. So there I sat sandwiched between Jackie and Sarah watching as the second of the sisterhood welcomed a fella into the family on a permanent basis. Surreal...and we will do it again in 2 months with Sarah and Adam.
Sitting in Jackie's kitchen you look up to a sign over the window that reads "Here Comes the Sun." These girls are my sunshine. They have been for a while and they will be for a long while to come. These fellas better take care of them, love them and make them happy. I may be the shortest, the chubbiest and in many ways the weakest, but if you mess with my girls the fact that I am the oldest and therefore the big sister will come out and bite you in the ass. That being said, I love these guys. I look forward to living out our lives, sharing stories, memories and witnessing their lives with my yayas.
Late last night before falling over into a deep wine induced sleep I asked Jackie would we be as close as we are if we met as the people we are now as opposed to the girls we were then. I don't really know the answer, but I think we grew up together and that is the tie that binds us. The impressionable years of early adulthood were shared together. Though we are unmistakeably different from our heights and hair colors to our religion and politics, we have left impressions and shadows of ourselves on each others hearts. We took each other in and for better for worse we are now apart of one another until sun sets for the final time in our lives.
To the Yayas their spouses, futures spouses and all those potential petites! Cheers and many happy returns to one another!

New Year, Old friends...

In making the end of year collage for 2008 and reading my pal Carrie's comment I am forced to think of the people who are missing from it. It was a great year, but looking ahead I have to say there are people I want brought back to the forefront in my life. The YaYa's, although were there as always to end and begin the year with me were distinctly absent from the rest of the year. The fault of course belongs entirely in my own lousy lap, and that is a situation that needs to rectified in the coming year. (Of course the two weddings should help greatly in that matter!)
Carrie and Bill. There have been times when they were the pillars that held me up. Carrie, who brings fun and laughter to a whole new level and Bill who makes me absolutely crazy, but grounds me like no one else. Their son is of course my nephew int he way that college makes a family and I have yet to pinch his cheeks like a good spinster aunt ought too. Again, a situation that must be fixed.
I suppose most obviously missing are the Corbins. How did I go a year with only 2 weekends in Asheville, and no pictures?!?! These are the parents and family I chose. They are a huge piece of my heart and in the silent moments I have felt their absence most severely. Living well and happy without them as a constant is probably the greatest testament to them and the health that they fostered in my life, but it is bittersweet. I need them. Not to have a reason to get up everyday, but just to love.
It's New Year, resolution time. Yes I need to loose weight and that's fine and good. I've given up soda and we will see how that goes, but more importantly I want to stop giving up time with my friends. That's my resolution.

Goodbye 2008

I can't get my head wrapped around a year end review so here are a few memories worth revisiting.